Divorce doesn't have to be a fight.
Family mediation can make your divorce faster, less stressful, and more
cost-effective.
Ruth Schocken Katz, mediator
What is mediation?
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Mediation creates a safe space for you and your ex to work out agreements and resolutions and to separate well.
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The mediator is always impartial and supports constructive communication by making sure the process is fair and emotions are regulated. They do not give advice, but can help with information to support the process.
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Decisions remain in your hands, not a third party, as is the case in court where a judge would make the decisions for you.
Mediation is therefore the most cost-effective, and the least adversarial and stressful way to separate or divorce. This is because you are both seen as equal in the process, which is underpinned by the needs and wishes of both of you being seen and valued.
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What's the process?
Initial one to one meeting - MIAM (Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting)
In a MIAM, each of you will meets me initially, on your own. This meeting provides an opportunity to learn about the process of mediation, and to give some information from your own perspective. You will be able to assess whether you feel that mediation is the right path for you, and whether you would like to mediate with me. I will also be evaluating whether mediation suits your needs. In most cases, any person applying to court on family matters will be required to attend a MIAM before proceeding. (There are some exceptions.) It is also srongly expected of the other party to attend. Generally courts prefer family disputes to be resolved outside of court. Unless exempt, a form signed by a mediator will have to be submitted to court to prove that an applicant had attended a MIAM.
Joint Meeting
Following the two MIAMs we will meet all together. Both of you will then be able to explore areas that are important to you in a safe space held by an impartial third person - the mediator. Usually issues discussed revolve around children's arrangement and financial settlements. In any financial matters, information will be documented and exchanged - in the form of Financial Disclosure - to create a clear visual grasp of the situation. Options and proposals for settlements are then considered to ensure that they are affordable, meet your needs, and are acceptable to both of you.
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Mediation usually takes between 2-5 joint meetings to work out solutions and agreements. Meetings take around 90 minutes. The number of meetings and length of time depend on the complexity of the situation and the level of conflict.
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Where do meeting take place?
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Meetings can be held in person in London, NW6 or virtually on zoom.
Child Inclusive Mediation
Children’s well being is paramount in family mediation and including the children’s views in mediation when appropriate is known to be hugely beneficial both for the parents and the child.
When appropriate and if all parties consent, a trained Child Inclusive Mediator will speak with the children. When children are too young or otherwise not able to engage in conversation, parents are strongly encouraged and guided to see the situation from their children’s point of view. Please speak with me for further information.
Government Voucher Scheme
For mediation on children's arrangements the government is offering a £500 voucher towards mediation (not MIAMs). Please speak with me for further information.
My Approach
I seek to hold a safe space to empower each individual to find their agency to see both themselves, and their ex-partner and resolve disputes well.
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Fully trained and now working towards accreditation with the Family Mediation Council, I have vast experience in coaching work, training and helping facilitate change in people’s lives.
I endeavour to make the process of separation an opportunity for growth and development, by creating new insights and making communication work better when it seems to have broken down completely.
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I am registered with the Family Mediation Council and the College of Mediators.
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